“I have a strict rule. No one is allowed to die on my watch,” a quiet assured voice in the vicinity of my right ear said. “I have to lower your pain level slower than you’ll like to keep my promise.” I have no idea if I nodded, but she thumbed a tear off my cheek.
Weeks before, I had blitzed right past “It’ll be a little rough coming out of surgery,” to the six week recovery period, and the day I could get back on my beloved SUP (standup paddle) board.
My husband and I flew to San Francisco and threw a party. I almost managed to forget I would return home to surgery, but here I was.
As she steadily brought the shocking fire in my belly to manageable levels, I became aware of the quiet bustle around me. My doctor stopped by, as did my anesthesiologist – who is a friend and neighbor – and then he went to reassure my husband. My pain angel, a pretty blue eyed blond, looked to be my daughter’s age. She didn’t leave my side.
She asked about my life, my interests. I inquired about hers. We share a love of being in nature. As we talked, she shared more vulnerable pieces. How a family welcomed her into their home and lives when hers was unbearable. How that family’s love encouraged her to follow her dreams.
Her shift ended. She came and gave me a warm sturdy hug, and as she turned out of my recovery room, she said, “This reminds me why I became a nurse.”
My husband and I share many things, a love of music, books, fine wine, travel, art, friendships, and family. Now we share robotic surgery. I could have gone a lifetime without that one. Or maybe not, as we didn’t know whether the tumors were benign or malignant. They were benign, and I am healing well.
For me, who splits wood for exercise in winter, and SUP’s a couple hours a day all summer, not lifting more than 5 pounds for six weeks chafed. I worked up to three miles a day walking, following surgery, to maintain stamina. Now I am reminding my abs that they have work to do, no more lazing around. The moment Mother Nature stops throwing tantrums, I will be on the water.
So, here’s to life, to love, to health, and to angels.
Laura, thank you for sharing your health journey with all of us. It was a moving and thoughtful story of your recovery. I am glad you are adding to your victories and soon will be out paddling again. I have loved your reflections on life and have been inspired more than once by them. You are a good teacher both in your writing and in your life.
I’ve come to believe that Kindness Heals and I think you might agree with that. You had a nurse who shared that quality with you in recovery. When people discover their calling and are dedicated to it good things happen. Even with all our faults and poor decisions we can still bring goodness into each others lives. We are wounded healer nothing else but we can share our strengths with each other and bring grace alive.
Isn’t it a wonderful thing to be human
I am glad everything turned out okay. L’Chaim!
As one who was diagnose with Multiple Myeloma 6 months ago and who has arrived at maintenance level therapy (Darrell), and one who was diagnose with Pulmonary Fribrosis six months ago and is now on Oxygen maintenance (Sue) we read you account of surgery, loving care and recovery with unusual empathy.
Life’s ups and downs are lived out with quiet assurance in the hope that love gives. As Nels FS Farre once wrote, ” Only when we know for certain in our hearts that love never fails and never loses its own,can we attain that eternal relaxation that achieves the maximum through creative concern.”
Blessings
Darrell & Sue Yeaney
Oh my goodness, my heart was pounding reading every word. Praise God you are well on your way to recovery. I will pray it so and pray you and back on the water, as soon as all the ice melts.
Important to mind what the doctor says however. Blessings on the day, D.
Oh, you hit home! I had a hip replaced on February 13th and the other hip is being replaced on April 20th. I had a difficult time with the pain meds and so we are changing the program for surgery #2. I have faith in the staff and my support system of Kent and four dogs to bring me through. It ain’t easy getting older.
Thank you Laura for this wonderful article. I will be doing the same thing on Tuesday the 10th, but I know mine is malignant. Many decisions to make. Your article is calming, God is good and I firmly believe this is part of His plan and I have a job to do. I just do not know what it is yet, but I am quite sure He will let me know. Keep on writing.
Mmmm. Here’s to seeing yourself in perfect health, and knowing your word makes it so. Excellent job.
In Gratitude and Wonder and Peace of Mind.