Written after a conversation with a woman who had just read The Fifth Sister, and shared her story with me.
You are amazing.
Look at what you’ve done with your life, given all you’ve been through. You have a heart full of love. They couldn’t take that from you.
You worked on yourself to make sure you didn’t do to another what they did to you.
You rose above horrifying betrayal and believed you could love and be loved.
You found a good spouse, who adores you, thinks you’re smart, witty, a little bit quirky, and loves you flaws and all.
You have given your children a safe home. They will never face fear, wounding, or disregard for the sanctity of their body.
You, incredible you, are teaching your children respect. Regard. Dignity, none of which were present in your childhood.
You took a chance on hope, teased up from your heart in those painful dark moments, and chose to chase that rainbow.
You, wonder that you are, know the true meaning of friendship. Of honor. Of loyalty, none of which you were offered as a child.
Your resilience is astounding. They were unable to break you.
Thank goodness you are here. You make the world a better place.
I was molested my my sister and mother until I was 22. I decided to break the chain. NO MORE! 6 years later my niece was born and I felt my moral obligation to protect her. I watched over her for a decade ensuring the bad touch was not being passed down from mother/grandmother to child. I had many talks with her as she grew up. I wanted her to understand that she has a right to privacy, boundaries, and her own space. I made sure that when my sister and mother did anything inappropriate, I would immediately scold them and tell them they were inappropriate and if that behavior continued, I would call Child Protective Services. Now my niece is 18 and my sister and mother acting more strange and hostile as usual. My brother-in-law approached me and asked what happened in my childhood that was so traumatic that it created this tension in my family. I told him the truth. decades of hiding what happened to me was released and it all made sense to him now. He asked me talk to his daughter and although mind-blowing, she experienced behavior that I had gone through with my sister EXCEPT she was able to defend her own space. I am happy to report she has not been molested and my decade or watching over her is a victory. I stopped the chain of abuse in my family. Now I am dealing with healing. I am not sure how to process decades of protecting my niece covertly. She is so grateful to me, and I would do it all over again. But how do I deal with opening up and now people know. (except my sister and mother, They don’t know I’ve told the family) I am not asking my family member not to talk about it as I STILL have to guard myself from my sister and mother. But I can’t process what the heck just happened. What happens from here? I know I will have an even closer relationship with my niece and brother-in-law. I don’t have to really deal with my sister and mother as much. I don’t want to relieve the pain of the past. Remembering how I fought this alone. I want to achieve some peace. I want to be OK. With therapy will that just happen on it’s own, in it’s own time?
I’ve just sent you an email response. Thank you for the courage to share your story.
That’s an amazing response – simply beautiful and heart-full! Joe W
Laura, I’ve read your post several times and realize once again you’ve written words to celebrate every person who has come through hell and a horror chamber and not only survived but thrived and flourished.
This is the Apostle’s Creed which should be published throughout the country and read aloud at every gathering of survivors. This demonstrates once again that true evil exists and while powerful it is not able to overcome truth, courage and determination. While there are bodies along the road the family of survivors is growing and this scourge is more and more being relegated to the garbage dump.
Thank for celebrating victories and giving voice to the truth every survivor carries within their body and being. Amen as one of your responders has also written.
Laura…Your words in this succinct post are AMAZING–as are you. Thank you for writing your heart!!
Your blog is like the Daily Word from Unity that I read every day.
Thank You
Amen.